Next story is difficult as it deals with one spouse using the children to hurt the other spouse, but collaborative helped.

5. Marriage of Sarah and Tim

Sarah and Tim have a 7 year old daughter Tiffany and a 5 year old son Max. 

Sarah has been going on trips for work and leaving the kids with Tim on the weekends of her trip.

After her return, one night, Tiffany says to Tim:  Dad can you rub my butt again like you usually do.  It feels good.  Sarah is devastated and confronts Tim.  Tim admits to his actions of sexual abuse and tells her that he was angry with Sarah and he knew hurting the kids would be the best punishment for Sarah.

Sarah hired me as her attorney and said that she does not want the kids to go through any more trauma and is afraid to get the police involved because of that.  I told her that her daughter needed therapy to deal with this and the therapist is mandated to report the abuse.   I searched and found a therapist who specializes in sexual abuse cases.  Sarah made an appointment in a week.  

I planned to get a divorce agreement for her within one week.

We went to court asking for immediate sole custody and monitored visitation.   I asked Tim if he would consider talking to me in an attempt to resolve all their issues of their divorce through settlement.  He agreed.

I completely set aside all my judgments and talked to him with abundant respect and understanding.  He was agreeable to sole legal custody and monitored visitation.  So we had a stipulated order with that regard.

With respect to all property and support issues, Sarah wanted him to transfer his share of ownership to Sarah.   Tim did not want to give up any money or property.  I addressed each issue with Tim, listening to him and validating his point of view.   He finally agreed to do that and Sarah agreed to take on their debts in return.

I immediately drew up the agreement.  It was a process of second thoughts and new concerns.  With every concern, I listened and addressed it with him with patience and respect.

Eventually they both signed and notarized the settlement agreement.  He moved to another state.  He was found by the authorities and brought back to LA and jailed on charges of child abuse.

We went to court and requested the Judge to grant the judgment pursuant to the agreement in time for her to refinance the house and get a better rate.  Sarah got her Judgment of divorce in record time having the date of their divorce months after getting the divorce judgment.