Next up, what can happen when one spouse doesn’t want the divorce.

6. Jenny and Gary

Gary loves Jenny so much and does not want the divorce.  Jenny wants a divorce and they have three children ages 6, 8, and 10.  Gary wants to please Jenny and give her everything she wants.  They are here for mediation.  Jenny wants sole legal, sole physical, all the holidays, all of her $200,000 401K that should be divided pursuant to family law.

Gary said that they agreed he would pay $2000 per month for child support.  Gary has a lot of credit card debts because he has been trying to please her and as he said he can’t even afford a bankruptcy. 

I ask for their income information and Jenny makes a lot more money than Gary does.  According to the law, Jenny would have to pay Gary spousal support and only $600 child support per month. 

Gary insists any way that he should pay $2000 per month as agreed.   Jenny wants him to pay for the children’s camp and private school and after school care and so on. 

Jenny complained that Gary gets angry too much. 

I told Gary: It looks like you give all that you have and then you put yourself under a lot of pressure and when she asks for more, you stress out and get angry.   He said well, I do anything for my kids.  I said then you need to make sure you are taken care of; that is important for your kids. 

Finally they agreed that he pays $2000 per month and no additional money for school or camp and she will have to manage all the kids expenses.